I had a job interview this week. Yay! Well, sort of. It is never a good thing when you know your moods are off and you have to try to make the best impression. It is physically painful. There are no words to describe it. In my head, I constantly kept repeating, “practice the pause” which to me meant repeat what they just said and think about what they said before you speak. I also was at all times holding out my hand for Jesus to hold it. In the car before I went in, I fervently prayed for the Holy Spirit to guide me and take control because I knew if left to me, I would utterly fail. How did I do? I seriously cannot tell you. I am not very confident. I will continue to seek new opportunities and after two days of beating myself up, I have finally turned it over to God and let it go. The point was, I was intentional.
What does the word intentional mean? Webster’s Dictionary defines it as, “done on purpose, deliberate.” So, if I was intentional with something, I knew I was doing it. I set out to do it. I took the time to do it. Somehow, someway, I prepared and made a way. I invested.
How often are we intentional? Not often. Acting without thinking is common place. Reacting or merely being is common place. Preparing for something is unheard of anymore. Why would anyone do that? We have smart devices everywhere. Technology can think and prepare for us so why should we need, want or have to be intentional with anything or anyone for that matter? We no longer have to remember appointments, important dates, events, places, favorites or preferences of those we love or care for, facts, history, learn skills or trades, read, invest, etc. It is all available at the touch of a few keystrokes. There are even devices that will remind you, talk to you, do it for you.
The difference between murder and manslaughter is intent. Second degree murder can be murdering someone with intent and malice but no forethought – in other words, in the heat of the moment. Speaking your mind without first tasting your words is intentional. I am often guilty of that. Speeding down the road knowing the speed limit but ignoring it because you’re late, upset, listening to music, not paying attention or whatever the reason, believe it or not, is intentional whether you want to admit it or not. Why? Because you were not intentionally trying to obey the speed limit, you know the repercussions and you chose – consciously or subconsciously – to speed. By default you were intentional.
We often wait for others to be intentional with us. Did they text us? Did they call us? Did they notice our haircut? Did they show up to our event? Did they choose us for this? Did they console us during our time of need? Did they do this or that? While this is human nature and it feeds this need we have within us, why do we get upset when they don’t? Think about it for a minute. We want them to be intentional with us. We wait for them to. In fact sometimes, we expect it. To a point, there are instances when we get a wee bit hurt when they don’t. I freely admit I am that way at times. But, I have to admit as I have worked on being more intentional myself, I have had to stop and ask myself this one question: what gives me that right? No one and I do mean no one owes me anything. No one owes me one single moment of their time. I have not earned it nor am I entitled to it. Not even my husband of nearly 30 years. What I have done is turned intention into selfishness. Where was my intention in all this? The truth: on me. Who do we get upset with when our expectations of their intentions are not met: them. Where is the problem with that logic: us.
It isn’t that they didn’t want to text us. It isn’t that they didn’t intend to call us. Sure, they noticed our haircut. Our event conflicted with their work schedule but you know what, they truly felt bad about it. They didn’t chose us because they knew we couldn’t participate because we were already committed which we would have said had they asked. They didn’t know we needed consoling because we assumed they knew and to be honest, we really would have felt uncomfortable if they did. Yet, somehow, we still felt that way. At no point did we take the time to be intentional with them. When was the last time we texted them? Invested a part of ourselves in the world around us?
It isn’t the big things that make the greatest impact. It is the little things. Why? Because the little things are intentional. It is the effort and thought that goes into the little things that make them the big things. And it is the little things that no piece of technology can replace. You can’t find it in a book – at least not how to actually apply it or share it. The answers won’t mysteriously flash on a screen. Inspiration can be found in the most unusual places but what good is that inspiration if we – human beings – don’t do something with it?
This week I have learned a lot about being intentional from Genesis. I set out to be intentional with my students in Sunday School class but it was me who learned the lesson. I think in my quest to be intentional, I was intentional with myself and God. God and me spent good quality time and He imparted love, mercy, wisdom and Ah-ha moments. He was intentional with me because I was intentional with Him. I think that is something I will continue to do. I don’t have it all figured out but the one thing I did figure out this week is when you are intentional with God, everything else will fall into place. That is an intention I intend to be intentional with.
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